There’s a scary moment in every relationship when things starts to get serious and you’re not mentally prepared for the next level.
Here is the thing, if you’re still hooking up and spending time with a woman you don’t want to date after a month or two, there is a chance you may accidentally back yourself into becoming someone’s bae.
If you have a bachelor’s pad like I do, you may wake up one day, look around and go, “oh snap, I’m someone’s boyfriend!” Suddenly you realize that she comes and goes as she pleases, she has a key to your place and the regular sex has become routine. Tough, huh? I don’t need to remind you that you’ve been enjoying the sex and her company so it is what it is.
One zillion questions start bubbling around in your brain and you try to figure out how you got here. You know you’ve not had “the talk” and your judgment has been clouded by the regular sex. You’re deep in the relationship so you can’t rock the boat now.
Well, Accidental Bae, here are the signs you may have missed.
The pink towel and the toothbrush
There comes a pivotal point in every hookup situation when a girl decides that she’s spent one too many mornings waking up in your bed so it starts with an extra toothbrush. Before long, a hairbrush shows up, a full beauty regiment bag follows and finally, a pink towel makes a grand entrance and stays for good. Bringing a toothbrush has a purpose and her intention is to stick around for a while so smile, you’re someone’s bae!
Sleepover no longer means sex
When you get to a point where you both can say “I’m too exhausted or I ate too much jollof rice or my cramps are killing me so can we just go to bed?” you must know that you’ve reached a higher status; Bae.
Her friends can’t wait to meet you
Has she sent those cute selfies you took to all her friends with heart-shaped emojis? Have you showed up on her snapchat with a crown of chirping birds around your head? Trust me, if her friends have pictures, congratulations are in order because you’ve graduated to Bae. If her girlfriends greet you with exceptionally warm smiles, get very comfy because you are part of the crew now.
The unexpected makeover
You have two solid pairs of shoes; one for work and another for outings. You have two pairs of sneakers; one for the gym and another for casual dressing. In your closet hangs the clothes which have stuck with you over the years. The shirt which shows your muscles, the one pair of jeans which goes with everything and your all-time favorite camouflage shorts. Have you received constructive criticism about your camouflage shorts lately? Has she suggested that you might want to think about replacing your favorite muscles shirt or getting another pair of jeans? Has she joked about throwing away some of your shoes because they look hideous? If she’s started the process of fixing you, she thinks you’re perfect and ready for primetime. Take it as a compliment that she hates your clothes and shoes because Bae needs you to show up looking fresh always!
The just-in-case box of pads
Fellas, I’ll tell you what you’ve got if you find a box of pads, tampons or panty-liners in your medicine cabinet or bathroom drawers; you’ve got yourself a girlfriend! Yayyyyyy! Let’s have another big round of applause for you! I’m not talking about the pocket-size feminine products. I’m talking about the value pack which will last for months before she runs out. Don’t fret; pads equals love. Be proud of yourself; Bae loves you.
Disclaimer: It’s important to state that in no way do I find a woman at fault for these forward-thinking actions.
By Kwadjo Panyin
Kwadjo Panyin is a Ghanaian born relationship and lifestyle blogger located in Los Angeles, California. He holds three degrees; a Bachelors degree from Rutgers University in New Jersey, an MBA from Franklin University in Ohio and a Masters of Science degree from Northern Kentucky University in Kentucky. Kwadjo is a business professional who blogs for fun. His articles are about the challenges of dating and relationship anomalies. Writing, blogging, world travel, and photography are his favorite hobbies.