She closes the curtains, dims the lights, hits play on her cool tunes playlist, lights a few candles, adjusts the pillows, drops her panties and climbs into bed.
Bob is already waiting for her on the bed. Bob is always ready to go to work. He does not need any type of stimulation, he stays rock solid 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. She grabs Bob, allows her imagination to run wild and starts playing with her double lattes.
Seconds in, her secret garden is moist and she grabs Bob and plunges deep inside. Her eyes are squeezed closed, sounds of pure pleasure fills the room and she draws in and out until she develops the violent shakes.
Bob (battery operated boyfriend) is my buddy Akosua’s friend. Akosua has been single for 2 years but she’s had lots of sex with Bob.
See, I’ve always wondered how single women like Akosua survive years without having sex with a man, or a woman if she so prefers. The answers had always been there but my slow mind never connected the dots. Bob was the answer.
A woman with Bob is still a somewhat taboo topic in our society. Most will not admit it but there is a growing trend of single women who own Bobs and put him to use often. Bob is a busy man and he has no choice but to enter open spaces when called upon; no questions asked.
Almost every single female friend I know and millions of women across the universe have a Bob. How do I know this? The sales generated by Bob companies are available for public consumption and the profits are in the billions.
I have personally contributed to the profits generated by Bob sales. My single female friends in Ghana do not shy away from asking for Bobs just before I visit from California.
The toys industry for women is far ahead of men’s toys and the fellas have a lot of catching up to do. Yeah, the toy industry takes very good care of the needs of women.
The abundance of Bobs may explain why women are better at saying no to some sexual opportunities and abstaining from sex for months and years while single.
Single women have it all figured out. They realize they can’t be out there having sex with whoever every time they get frisky.
Like most men, I mistakenly assumed that single women can have sex when they wanted to. All they have to do is walk up to a man and ask if he wants to come back to her place for some quality time. If she is hot, she can pick up any man she wants.
I forgot that women are more careful about who they have sex with and when. They worry about their reputation, how many sexual partners they have on their resumes, unwanted pregnancies, STDs and getting taken advantage of. With Bob in hand, most women need not worry about these issues.
When I get super frisky as a man, the last thing I worry about is how many women I’m adding to my sexual history or an unwanted pregnancy. If my green eye bandit has not had play time in months, the fear of consequences goes out of the window.
All I want to do is plug a hole. It’s at this moment of weakness that single women have the upper hand and are able to think clearer. Yup, the girl I’m crushing on probably had some Bob time last night so she is cool. Meanwhile, I’m staring at her double lattes the entire time because it’s been a while since I’ve seen a pair.
Thanks to Bob, I have a nagging suspicion that most single women have their heads screwed on tight when they face temptations or get into frisky situations. Why rush into bed with a man and make him think you’re an easy lay when you can just have Bob.
We can all agree that Bob will never be a substitute for what an actual man can do however, a single woman can regulate and pace out when sex will happen even if she really wants it.
I don’t have a male version of Bob to help me slow down my strong desires so I’m screwed. I’m begging for some because it’s been months meanwhile, she is calmly making me hold my horses. I mean, what the French? Don’t you single women miss the action as much as I do? Well, I used to ask this question before I discovered the impact Bob was having on single sisters.
It’s socially acceptable for a single man like myself to struggle with a strong sexual drive and temptations. Single women have desires and they struggle as much as I do with temptations. However, it’s a taboo to talk openly about the sexual desires and struggles of single women in most social circles.
We’ve come a long way when it comes to women and Bobs. Most of us are no longer shocked when we hear single women talk about Bobs. Have you noticed the double standard society applies to men who use or talk about sex toys though?
The gentleman who recently revealed that he bought a sex doll was labeled as a creepy pervert and a desperate loser. Women who acquire Bobs are not described the same way.
Most of us assume single women have a strong grip on their sexual desires and they have things under control. I mean, we don’t go around picturing single women shoving Bobs into their secret gardens. With that, most single women continue to enjoy the tranquility which comes with having Bob as a permanent rock solid substitute. In today’s society, a man will not be given the same level of tranquility.
Most single women don’t need to bend to the will of their desires by having sex with uncommitted men. Thanks to Bob, a single woman can easily make up excuses such as having a headache to get out of sex. When was the last time you heard a single man coming up with excuses to get out of sex? Single women can churn out excuses and still come out looking like they have total control over their sexual desires.
Sure, a single dude has his hands as a substitute if he really needs to reduce his backed up inventory. Using ones’ hands is not enough though. I’ve not used my hands since I left college. I always want the real thing and I believe hands are for college boys.
For the fellas who use their hands, perhaps it’s time to give your hands a break. Perhaps it’s time to even the playing field by trying out a new sensation by getting into some toys.
I totally understand that there is a stigma associated with men in our culture who show an interest in toys. That stigma has not changed. Should a man mention that he uses a sex toy, he is more likely to be ridiculed and ostracized.
Like millions of men out there, we are horn-dogs. Personally, I know my green eye bandit starts to get antsy if he goes past three months with no action. So we can go out and pester a woman for sex or, we can consider a toy to take care of the immediate need.
I believe Bob has given most single women an upper hand on when and how sex happens. I am not advocating that men should go out and buy dolls. I’m simply pointing out that there’s a huge disparity in how single women handle sexual desires versus single men.
Maybe if men start using toys with the same frequency and intensity as some single women, they may actually stop creating havoc out there and earn their good reputation back.
It is all about regulating and controlling our strong sexual desires and at this time, men are at a disadvantage.
It sounds and looks creepy to picture an adult male plugging away at a plastic doll. Then again, do you find a woman digging in with Bob also creepy and disturbing? If you do, I’m sorry but I feel the need to tell you that some single women are plugging away now as you read this article. It is probably happening in the room next to you or somewhere in your neighborhood.
Sex is an amazing thing and if you don’t have a partner to have it with, then toys can take care of business and prevent you from making hasty decisions in relation to sex.
It’s just plastic, folks. We should all just chill and dig in.
By Kwadjo Panyin
Kwadjo Panyin is a Ghanaian born relationship and lifestyle blogger located in Los Angeles, California. He holds three degrees; a Bachelors degree from Rutgers University in New Jersey, an MBA from Franklin University in Ohio and a Masters of Science degree from Northern Kentucky University in Kentucky. Kwadjo is a business professional who blogs for fun. His articles are about the challenges of dating and relationship anomalies. Writing, blogging, world travel, and photography are his favorite hobbies.